I'm sweatin' over here

And I don't sweat.

But that's what a whoppin' 50 degrees will do to ya after living in arctic temperatures the past two months.

You'll think that 50 degrees is warm.

Actually, you'll think that 36 degrees is warm in the mornings when you leave the house, and by the afternoon when it gets up to 50 it's just plain hot, and you sweat.

That's what Nebraska has done to me. It's made me delusional into thinking 36 degrees is warm, and 50 degrees is hot!

If I was still living in South Florida I'd be suffering from hypothermia. Yeah, really. I would be.

But, we're not in South Florida anymore...so my body has betrayed me, and actually got acclimated to the cold.

Well, as much as possible for me. I'm a perpetually cold person by nature. Like, if being cold was a disease, then, well, I'd have a disease of being cold. Which makes this all the more sick that I actually think that 36 degrees is warm and 50 degrees is hot. That's just so warped in my world.

So, because mornings of 36 degrees is now considered warm, we are taking full advantage of playing outside and getting every bit of vitamin D the sun had to offer.

We went berserk on our snowman and crushed him to smithereens. Picked up snow balls and flailed it into our tree. 

 We walked our favorite walking trail.

Road bikes. Climbed mountains of snow.

Got reacquainted with old toys and played in the mud.

 that is one adorably dirty tooshie.

hello heat wave!

The waiting game

I feel like I am in a perpetual state of "wait".

Waiting to hear back about adopting.
Waiting to hear back about a mission opportunity.
Waiting to hear back about a photography opportunity.
Waiting to hear back from the doctor about test results.

Waiting.Waiting.Waiting.

And as I unloaded to Isaak the other night, he said, "don't worry about it." And I thought, "I'm not worrying about it....I'm just tired of waiting." 

I feel like all I'm doing lately, is waiting to do something. Waiting to hear. Waiting to know what's next. And normally waiting doesn't bother me so much. I can usually push it to the back of my mind and go on with my life until there's a development. But I'm having a harder time doing that right now. It's harder because I am waiting to hear back about multiple things.

I was standing in front of my sink yesterday, praying, and thinking about everything, and my thoughts fell on Abraham. I love Abraham. He was so, imperfect. He struggled with things. He was a slow learner. But learn he did. And overcome he did. But Abraham had to wait twenty five years for a son. He lived in a perpetual state of wait. For twenty five long years. And I can't even fathom what that must have been like for him. For Sarah. Having to wake up each day and wonder if this would be the day.

9,125 days. To wake up. And wonder. To wake up. And wait.

That's a long time.

Even if he was able to push down the thoughts so he wasn't obsessing over them....the thoughts would still be there. He would never be able to escape them. He would never be able to fully keep himself from thinking about what was to come. While he was planting in the fields, those thoughts would be there. While he was eating dinner with Sarah, those thoughts would creep in. While they traveled, gave directions to his servants, rescued family, served angels.....there would be that nagging little thought in the back of his head....taunting him....asking...."is this the day???"

And, I can't imagine that all the times the Lord came to him and reaffirmed His promise, gave new provisions, and clearer direction....that made Abraham feel better. Yes, he believed the Lord. Yes, he loved the Lord. But then a year goes by of waiting, and nothing to show for it. Five years goes by, nothing to show for it. Ten years goes by, still nothing. Twenty, and still zilch. He had to wonder.....

"when Lord? when? how much longer do I have to wait??"

Not had to wonder....he did wonder. The promise haunted him. And Sarah.

And they got fed up with waiting.
They didn't feel like they could go one.more.day. without an answer.
Haunted them so much so that they tried to take matters into their own hands and force an answer. Force the results they so desperately waited for.

But in the end....they learned...you can't force God's hand. You can't force God's plan.

God was faithful to answer. Not in their time though. And the Lord reminder me of the same, through my favorite imperfect, slow learning, but LORD loving man Abraham.

^"LORD, I wait for you; you will answer, Lord my God."  Psalm 38:15

"In the morning, LORD, you hear my voice; in the morning I lay my requests before you and wait expectantly." Psalm 5:3

"Wait for the LORD; be strong and take heart and wait for the LORD." Psalm 27:14

 
"I wait for the LORD, my whole being waits, and in his word I put my hope." Psalm 130:5

"I say to myself, “The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.” Lamentations 3:24

You are my portion. You are my portion. You are my portion. 

Good morning sunshines

Love them bunches and bunches.

Last week in review-Daddy Daughter Dance and more.

Last week was, interesting. 

We were once again trapped indoors by this winter's unrelenting snow and cold. I actually woke up on Monday to the sound of squealing tires trying to inch their way up the inclined driveway to the base chapel located directly behind our house. Because everything was covered under an invisible layer of ice all the cars that tried to drive up to the chapel just reversed it back onto the street after their tires nearly started smoking in a vain attempt to conqueror the icy drive. Not a single car made it up. :~) It was pretty funny. So much so I actually spent thirty minutes at the window watching.
Wow.
Just writing that makes me realize how sad that is. It's like when you see people in their lawn chairs, on their front porch watching the paint dry...because they have nothing better to do. And here I am, sitting at my window, watching the cars try to climb an icy hill...because I have nothing better to do. Ohhh, that's soooo sad.

Anyways, school was canceled, again, because of weather.

And then Marvelly got sick with a mysterious fever for two days.

I was in a funk and in desperate need to escape mentally, so I broke out some favorite books and sailed away to Forks for a couple days.

By the end of the week things started picking up. Marvelly's fever had finally passed, the icy roads had finally melted and just in time for their hair appointments on Thursday. Thank goodness too, we needed to get out, and they needed a good trimming.

befores....

and the only 'after' shot I have, Marvelly is now sporting an almost shoulder length do. Once the humidity returns it will bounce back up and rest on her shoulders. Sydaleigh's is still long. Not that long...but long.

Friday we had a game night date with our neighbors, which was super fun. Our love of board games is definitely being resurrected...thanks in part to our obsession with Catan. 

Saturday was the annual Daddy Daughter Dance at the community center. Isaak had two very pretty dates that evening who were very eager to get dressed up for their daddy.

They danced, ate, did the limbo, schmoozed with friends, took pictures....and had an all around fantastic date night with daddy.

 And while they were away this mommy took off for a fun night of my own! Girls night was way overdue. Taco bar, Liz's house, my gang of ladies, two yummy cakes, Loaded Questions, lots of inappropriate answers, laughing till my sides hurt, laughing till I cried, laughing till I couldn't even laugh anymore because I was laughing so hard. My kind of night. :~)

The weekend definitely redeemed itself! We started out dragging but ended on a high note.

Like mommy like Marvelly

Eye color and height aren't the only things we pass onto our kids....

apparently sleeping with your mouth open is also capable of being passed on in your DNA.

There are worse traits to inherit I suppose, but none nearly as attractive. :~) Ohhhh yeaaaaaahhhh.

Patience child....patience...

I'm trying not to stalk my email.....
I'm trying not to pace up and down the hallway....
I'm trying to be patient.
Trying.
But word is a week overdue.
'Word' being something I set my heart on before I even gave myself permission to set my heart on it.
A life long dream.
A life long passion.
An answered life long prayer.
An amazing opportunity.
And it's at my fingertips.
And I'm just waiting on the word.
My heart wants this so bad and being patient while I wait for it is not easy.....

Disney say what?!

"I'm sorry....what?!"

"WHAT?!"

I feel like I have just had the wind knocked out of me....anxiety attack may be approaching (or it would be if I was prone to anxiety attacks).

I just read....*breathe, breathe*.....

....that Disney will not be making any more...... princess movies.

And it's not just the end of princess movies....but ALL FAIRY TALES!!

Disney...say what?!

No more princess movies? No more fairy tales?!

Wha....I....ugh.....

COME AGAIN?!!!!!

What do you mean? How can this be? What will come of the world without the musical happily ever after's I've come to love? I shudder to think.

Literally, shuddering.

All because you seem to think that little girls these days grow out of the princess stage too quickly therefore not making it worth the effort to continue investing in this market. Well, Mr. Disney.....I will have you know that in this house we fully recognize our princess potential. Yeah that's right. I am a proud princess and am taking personal offense to you assuming that all girls turn in their tiaras at five and stop singing along to the animated goodness of Tiana, and Rapunzel, and Ariel.

That's nonsense, nonsense I tell you!!!

If I ever felt inclined to protest over anything in my life it would be this.

"Bring.back.fairy.tales! Bring.back.fairy.tales!  Bring.back.fairy.tales!"

Seriously....no more princesses, singing, neurotic step mothers, sparkley sparkles, princes, fairy god mothers, talking animals, and happily ever afters.

Disney pulling the plug on princesses.....what is the world coming to......I.do.not.know.

'This' all needs to go away

I'm starting to go a bit stir crazy.

For the first two months of winter I'm usually pretty good, I fair pretty well. But come February, I start to lose it. The snow, the wind, the freezing temperatures.....all start to wear on me just, a little bit.

I haven't been outside, in, I don't remember when. And going to and from the car for church, and preschool, and Target doesn't count as being outside. That is more like running and holding your breath so your throat don't freeze....not the same.

My toes are cold, even with two pairs of socks, and slippers covering them.
My floors are cold, even with towels rolled up in front of the cracks to stop the wind from creeping in.
The house is cold even with the thermostat set to 75.
I can hear the wind swirling and whirling around outside, because it's Nebraska, and it's windy, and the windy wind is loud. Which is an ever unpleasant reminder that outsides is off limits.
The ground is once again covered under a slick layer of ice and snow. Which makes getting the mail a death trap.
The pipes get so cold it's hard to keep the water warm so we have to crank up the water heater to scalding (yes, that's an actual setting). So every time I turn the water to 'hot' to keep my fingers from turning to popsicles while doing the dishes I get 3rd degree burns. 
My body is tired all the time because it's trying to hibernate due to the frigid temps.

So yeah, it's February, which means that while my thoughts concerning the pretty white fluff hanging around yesterday were something like, "oh, yeah, how pretty, I love the snow," has officially turned into today, "get that crap off my lawn, off my car, off my driveway, off my shoes because I looooooooathe you."

This all needs to go away.

(wishing I had some magically sparkly red shoes right now to wish this winter away. darn fairytales for making me believe you have super powers!)

"That's how love is"

It's a beautiful day today. There is a chill in the air, but the temperature is above freezing. The wind is mild, and the sun is bright.

We are covered under snow. Lots, of snow. And because we are smack dab in the middle of winter, the air doesn't warm up too much to melt it away.

But then there was today.

Where the sun came out. Lit up the sky, and it's gentle rays of light shown down upon the cold damp earth and started to flood it with warmth. And brightness. And a little at a time, the cold edge of winter started slipping away....

The earth lay covered under a layer of cold and confining ice and snow. Heavy clouds cluster together and try to block the suns rays. It's effect runs deep. Winter's coldness penetrates the ground and suffocates the life that lay beneath it. There is no growth. There is no warmth. Only darkness and colds bone chilling pains.

Everything is shroud in hard jagged ice. The ground, trees, plants, and every blade of grass...covered in solid water. Creations outer shell is now thick, rigid, listless.

But, in the midst of the clouds and cold that seek to smother all that is alive...Light finds a weak spot in the clouds. A small opening. And a ray shines through. And the power that lies in that single ray of sunlight begins to slowly saturate what lays frozen and paralyzed. Light...the one thing capable of melting away the hardness to reveal again the soft beauty that lay buried underneath. Now, under the layers of stifling cold and damp and dark, new life begins to peak through. And a little bit at a time, the icy exteriors begin to melt away in it's Presence.

The presence of Light can be very subtle. And it's effects often slow. The icy ground doesn't melt away all at once. Winter's grip doesn't fade immediately. But, a little bit at a time, all that lays frozen begins to thaw. And then drip. And that drip turns into a puddle. And that puddle starts to move and saturate the ground.

And before you know it, the icy chains are gone. All that water that was once confined to those bitter icy walls, can move freely. The blades of grass that stood motionless under the weight of snow and darkness can sway again in the wind. They can begin their journey of growth. Climbing back towards the sky.

There is life again. Freedom. Movement. Softness. A rebirth. An awakening. A newness.

All because of the subtle life changing beams of Light. That shines down. Touches all that was once cold and dead and stiff and makes it alive again.

It might appear to be cold and hard and lifeless on the surface. But inside, where the Light shines down and touches and brings healing with it's warmth...

there is a melting taking place.

Sydaleigh- "Look Mom, I'm laying in the light. I love the light."

"Me too baby. Me too......"

"Why does God content himself with the slow, unencouraging way of making righteousness grow rather than avenging it? That's how love it. Love has its own power, the only power ultimately capable of conquering the human heart."

A day without a nap is like a cupcake without frosting.

"The days are cold, the nights are long,"

"The North wind sings a doleful song;"

 "Then hush again upon my breast;"

"All merry things are now at rest,

 

Save thee, my pretty love!"

~Dorothy Wordsworth, "The Cottager to Her Infant"

 (she has taken more naps this week than in the past six months. I think this little one may be growing.) :~)