Not like riding a bike

I used to be a really good sewer when I was younger. My Mom had us do years and years of 4-H where we learned how to sew clothes, blankets, pillows, dolls...the whole nine yards. But, sadly, once we stopped participating in 4-H my sewing skills got a little bit rusty.

So rusty in fact...I couldn't even get the thread in the needle today!

I was trying to hem some dress pants that are like 20 inches too long, so I pull out the sewing machine, get all ready, and see that the little piece of thread is not in the needle that goes up and down (don't you love my sew lingo, I have no idea what it's all called)...so I preceded to take the next 20 minutes trying to stick that little piece of thread through that little tiny hole!

20 minutes!

My quiet time during the afternoon is precious and I actually wasted 20 minutes of it trying to thread a needle...and the saddest part is I never did!

Even sadder is that I had to wait for Isaak to come home so he could do it for me!

Which he did.

You see I have this dream that when me and Isaak retire we're going to get a big piece of land, set aside some of it to grow corn...I'm going to wash our clothes by hand, because I'm retired and I have so much time that, why not wash my clothes by hand! I'm not going to need to go to the store to buy food because we're going to grow it in our garden, which I'm going to tend to everyday. (My favorite book is Redeeming Love and two of my favorite movies are Gone With the Wind and Far and Away...this is where I get these radical notions. )

But after today whom I kidding! I can't even thread a needle...how the heck am I going to be able to grow corn let alone harvest it!

I think I need to put sewing on my "2010 Must Learn To Do List"...which I just made right now. And prior to relearning how to sew is relearning how to thread a needle. Followed by learning how to be a farmer...

ADOPT workshops 1 & 2

COMPLETE!

This Thursday and Friday we had to attend a two full day adoption workshop. Isaak got off work, and Sydaleigh and Marvelly spent the last two days with Holly and the girls. It was from 8-4 on Thursday and 9-4 on Friday, which sounds like a lot...and it was. I kept thinking going into this...why are they making us go to these workshops, I hope this is worth it....and oh my gosh...it was definitely worth it! And I'm so glad they made us go! The wealth of information they provided us with was astounding.

We heard from a panel of adoptive parents, a panel of birth mothers, and a panel of adoptive parents with the birth mother. We were talked to by experts dealing with trans-racial adoptions, grief and depression, all the legal manners behind adoption, post adoption. We were briefed on everything under the sun concerning the case workers role, expectations, false expectations, and not to mention the countless resources they provided us with....it was so awesome.

I love.this.agency! It was truly a God-thing finding them because even though me and Isaak were certain we wanted to adopt, we didn't know what to do next. But I know that this is where we need to be and these are the people we need to get us through this.

Some things I was exposed to the past two days.....

...how emotionally raw birth mothers are. They are not some nameless faceless abstract woman. They are real. They have feelings. And this is very very hard for them. And I saw that today. I was given a glimpse of the hurt. The broken dreams. The less than ideal circumstances. The acceptance of those broken dreams. The joy in knowing they made the right decision. The gratefulness in receiving pictures, letters, and phone calls. How healing takes time. For some, a lifetime....

.....the ins-and-outs of what a trans-racial adoption looks like. The everyday things that families face, the children face, the struggles, the questions, the techniques in parenting a child with a different ethnicity than yours, the support available to you....(this was one of my favorite parts of the workshop!)

.....the whole legality behind adoption. The birth mother's rights, the biological father's rights, the adoptive parents rights, getting all those rights, what can hold up the process, what the courts require...it had my head spinning at times.

I don't know the requirements with all the different adoption agencies across the country and around the world. I do know our agencies. And our agency requires all prospective adoption parents to attend this two day workshop prior to starting their home study. I thought this was absurd at first. But these past two days I've found out the importance. You want to be as well equipped as you possibly can be when considering adoption. It's complicated. So you want to be well informed. You want to be well educated. You need to be able to ask questions. You need to be able to talk with experts who do this for a living. Experts who live and breathe this everyday. Experts who've been though this a hundred times and back and can talk you through it. You need to know what adoption is all about from every perspective...most importantly, the childs, so that you can be the best parent to them possible.

Now, our next step is being assigned a case worker and beginning our home study. And then that's all that lay between us and being placed on a waiting list. Let the process continue!

Sydaleigh's 4th birthday

Very early on the morning of Sydaleigh's 4th birthday Isaak sneaked silently out of the house, went to the store, and bought some balloons for Sydaleigh before she woke up. We put her presents and balloons at the table and when she came down for breakfast she was absolutely giddy with delight. She had been waiting and waiting for her birthday, talking about it everyday all day for probably the past 6 months. She was thrilled that it finally arrived.


Of course she got more princess polly pockets, which is all she wanted.


for dinner she got to eat her favorite meal, macaroni and grilled cheese,
and washed it down with birthday cake and ice cream.



A few days later a couple of her friends came over to play and eat cake for her birthday.

She had specifically requested a Snow White cake, so I did my best,
and this is what I came up with.

She got a few more polly pockets and a really cool Cinderella book bag with her name on it, perfect for school in the Fall.
I can't believe Sydaleigh has been in our lives for 4 years now.
Amazing.
And truly a joy she is.
Happy birthday my love.

Sydaleigh at 4

Passionate about everything
Extremely ticklish (still)
would prefer to wear a dress or skirt any day of the week
loves her princesses
believes with all her heart that her princesses are real, thank you Disney World.
also loves her doll 'Dandy' (that she found in the bottom of a garbage garage sale box brought over by a neighbor),
doesn't do well in crowds, prefers only a couple special friends at a time,
can write the whole alphabet,
wants to "learn" about everything,
can sing the lyrics to virtually every Disney and Momma Mia song,
entering a challenging new phase; trying to exert control over everything, and everyone,
can't sleep without her Marvelly in the room,
Loves being a big sister, which she thinks entitles her to being the boss, which makes for lots of fun thanks to her new "controlling" phase,
Loves to sing at the top of her lungs for the whole world to hear,
can recite virtually every line from every movie she's ever seen,
told me the other day she wants to be a doctor when she gets bigger so she can help people,
has a very natural desire to take care of others,
enjoys the added responsibility of being 4, until it interferes with whatever she's doing,
loves going to the gym with Daddy and playing soccer, which she is very good at,
she can finally do a summersault,
loves to build houses out of the couch pillows,
favorite game to play is hide and seek,
can count to '10' really fast and in doing so forgets the number 5,
can count to 20, sometimes,
entered into a fascinating phase of imaginative play,
talks about her birthday all the time and what toys she wants, even though
we just celebrated her birthday, she's getting a head start on her next one,
and loves Jesus.

The heart of my four year old

Tonight, after I tucked the girls in bed I said a prayer for the Haitians. In a very simple way the girls could understand I asked that the Lord would keep them safe and continue to meet the their needs.
After I finished, Sydaleigh asked me, "Mommy, why did you pray for them?"

"Well, because there was an earthquake and some people got hurt, and their houses and stores fell down. So now, lots of people don't have a house anymore, and no stores to buy food to eat." I respond.

Sydaleigh thinks about what I said and asks, "are they bleeding?"

"Yes," I say, "some of them are bleeding."

"Well, we need to help wash them off and get them band-aids!!" Sydaleigh exclaims. "Mommy, I'm going to be a doctor so that I can help people! "We need to help them!" "Can I help them Mommy, all by myself?!" "Can I help the boys and girls, and you can help the mommies and daddies?!" " Can I go over there and tell them, 'Do not be afraid. I am with you. Isaiah 41.10' ."

We continued this talk for another few minutes, with Sydaleigh rattling off ideas as fast as she could think of them...coming up with all kinds of ways she can help, from sending money, to sending them hot dogs and ice cream so they have food to eat.

Wow. I love this girl. I love her heart. I love knowing that as she speaks God is smiling with delight upon her. I love that at her tender simple age of four years old she has a desire to help people. It's my prayer and hearts desire that one day, she would be able to help the people of this world that she speaks of now. I pray that God would give me the wisdom to show her how to do that. I pray that one day she will take the opportunity to go out into the world and be Christ's hands and feet. To help them. To wash them off and give them band-aids. To give them hot dogs and ice cream. To tell them about our God who says, "Do not be afraid. I am with you."

I had this ghetto lamp

This torchiere lamp was so ghetto you had to stick a pen cap inside it in order for it to turn on.
The faux glass shade was so ghetto it didn't screw into the top any more, so we had to balance it on top and hope it didn't fall off and crash on someone's head.
Today; however, I am proud to announce this ghetto of all ghetto lamps is no more.
I have finally replaced it with a lamp that won't leave us flinching out of fear of electrocution every time we turn it on.
A lamp that won't result in a concussion.
Just a plain ole' regular non-ghetto lamp.
Now that its been replaced I just have to make sure it gets thrown away.
I never want to see that thing again.

O Happy Day

"Oh happy day, ohhhh happy daaaay!!"

I saw New Moon again tonight, and it was soooo much better!!!
The fog has officially lifted people!
I can function, laugh, smile, and have a general overall happiness with life.
The world is as it should be!

Hallelujah!

White bread is the bomb

I just love white bread.
But unfortunately, there is this big push right now, and has been for a really long time actually, that wheat is so much better for you.
So of course that is what I buy.
Because "they" say it's better.
I make my kids eat wheat, my husband eat wheat, myself eat wheat.
Wheat wheat wheat.
It's one of "those" rules..."You must eat WHEAT bread!"
Well, not today! Because I said, "Oh phooey" to wheat bread,
and I bought soft fluffy delicious chemically enhanced high fructose corn syrup injected white bread.
Yeah that's right!
I'm a white bread buying rebel!
And it was divine.
Truly, wheat does not even compare to the deliciousness of white bread.
You can just pull a slice out of the bag and let it melt in your mouth.
No need to toast it, butter it, or lather it in anything.
White bread can stand alone.
It is just.that.good.
So, I have two loaves to last me the next week.
I could only allow for two loaves for fear that the wheat bread police might come and raid my house of the good stuff.
So for the next week...I will be soaking up the goodness that is white bread.

Current thoughts

I have a lot on my plate, and never enough time to get it all done.
I'm struggling managing my time effectively right now.
I'm struggling because I feel like I have no time.
How does a wife, a mom, a cleaner, a photographer, a friend, a bible study wannaber, an adoption planner, an exercise trainee, vacation researcher, a project maker....be all those things?
I'm looking at a pile of clean laundry that's been sitting on my bench for a week.
It's sitting there because everyday I run out of time to put it away.
So, I just dig for a clean sock here.
A long sleeve shirt there.
Hoping I will wake up and find that secret elves have put it all away for me.
I'd really like to have my life all pulled together at the same time.
I'd really like to have all my ducks in a row, in the same row, perfectly positioned, at the same time.
Not a duck up here.
A duck down there.
A duck running across the street over there.
Just a straight row of ducks.
I don't think that's asking for too much.
Now about those extra hours in the day that will allow me the opportunity to get them lined up...
still working on that one.

Free 8x10 Canvas!

I found this link via another friend's blog. I just ordered mine and I only had to pay for shipping!

Free 8x10 photo gallery wrap canvas

Very good deal!

Is it March 20th yet?

Is it? Is it? Is it spring yet?


I woke up this morning and The Weather Channel said it was -23 degrees (real temperature, no wind chill)!
That is just so wrong!
When it gets that cold it literally physically hurts to breathe when outside.
And we still have to endure 74 more days of winter.
I don't even know what to say except that I'm so cold! All the time!
This arctic chill may actually force me over the edge, I may actually have to break down and buy....
a Snuggie!
NOOOOOOOOOOOO!!!!!!!

(on the bright side....it's actually bright outside! The sun is gloriously shining despite the fact that I may be forced to wear a Snuggie!)