How bad can malaria be? I mean really.

Oye.

I've been researching anti-malaria meds all.day.long. Reading medical reports. Comparing side effects. And after a mind-numbingly frustrating day....I have come to a conclusion.

I would rather take my chances getting MALARIA itself than take any of those FA-REAKY medications!!

I mean, a girl that starts throwin' dirt on her own grave when she stubs her toe because she thinks that the toe stubbing incident has caused a blood clot when she feels a mystery pain coming from her calf area...should not be allowed to research anti-malaria meds.

Too.may.side.effects.

And I know me.

I will get every single one.

I mean, how the crap am I suppose to know if the irregular itching is from the medication, or some new weird invisible African creature that has taken up residence in my sheets??

How I am suppose to know if the vomiting is from the medication or the contaminated water I will inevitably drink?

How am I suppose to know that the swelling of the lining of my mouth is from the malaria meds or.....nope....it will probably just be from that.

Or the peeling of the skin?
Or the hair loss?
Or the psychotic hallucinations??
Or the purple hives?
Or the sun bruising?

What the crap is sun bruising?!?! 

I feel like I'm about to have a Sydaleigh episode and start screaming at the doctor on Thursday, " I won't take it! I won't take it! You can't make me!"

You know how they (they being everyone) tells you not to resort to Dr. Google when researching a health problem......

Google..."eye twitching causes"
Results...eye cancer. 
....because it will always turn out that one of your symptoms is cancer! 

Well....never frequent an anti-malaria discussion board because all everyone talks about is how they almost died from severe medication side effects...and how they got cancer from it! (okay, maybe not that last part).

If you ask me malaria is lookin' better and better compared to this medication. I mean, get malaria for a week....or imagine I'm being eaten alive by flesh eating ants? 

I may just take my chances with the malaria thank you very much.

This totally bites.
(ha ha...get it...bites...mosquitoes...malaria...flesh eating ants....never mind.....I'm going to go finish re-reading Twilight for the fourth time...oh...again...bites....vampires. Dang man. I'm on a roll tonight!)