Well, I shoulda figured with Isaak leaving for a teeny tiny TDY for the first time in who knows how stinkin' long....that something, was bound, to go wrong.
Little did I know that as I was running out the door at 8:45 this morning to take Sydaleigh to school, in the clothes I wore to bed, with my house looking like a land fill, and smellin' like one too...that that something would go wrong.
I stand at the front door of the house on our way out and press the 'open' button for the sliding door on my van on the keys, and the door doesn't open. I stand there and push it again, waiting for the side door to glide its way on back...and again, nothing.
Hmmm, well, I don't know. Maybe the keys forgot how to work! It's Monday, I forget how to work on Mondays. I didn't want to get outta bed this morning. I was tired from last night, and every other night since Isaak left because for some reason I don't go to bed till late in the night when he's gone.
So yeah, maybe my keys were tired. Maybe they just needed me to shake em a bit.
Hmm, no, not responding to my shaking.
Maybe they need me to scream at them, that'll wake em up.
Nope, still not doin' what I want.
Maybe if I shake and scream and push down on the 'open' button really hard all at the same time, THEN, they will open the sliding door.
Well dang. What is up with my keys?! They didn't respond to any use of force I assaulted on them.
Guess I'm gonna have to walk over to the car, and open the door myself!
"Lousy keys, just do what you're told already! Don't you know it's Monday!"
So, I walk over to my van, and I pull on the door handle all.by.myself. *gasp* And wouldn't ya know, the door didn't glide back. It barely opened at all. I think maybe my keys weren't the problem. Good thing cause I was ready to chuck them in the street. (I was tired. Okay?! I'm not normally this neurotic.)
After further investigation, nothing is moving, lighting up, or making noise in any way to prove that my van is working.
Well, dang.
At this point my keys not working would have been the lesser of the problem. Now my whole van has called it quits!
And Isaak is gone. And it's 9am in base housing so all my male neighbors are gone. And the only one who wasn't gone got home an hour ago because he's working mids. No way I'm knockin' on his door.
Well, dang. Quite the predicament. I leave a very pathetic message on Isaak's phone making it quite evident that I am helpless and have no idea how to fix the car, that is mysteriously not starting, and I can't even find the latch on the hood, to pretend like I would even know what I'm looking at.
What's a girl to do with no husband around to help?
Call a friend to come over and help me. Love it how military wives band together. As soon as I explained my predicament, I get a, "yup, no surprise something went wrong when he left, something always does!" And then in the afternoon while I skyped I heard, "yup,no surprise something went wrong when he left, something always does. Better stop while it's just the car, don't run the sink, flush the toilet, or turn on the furnace, cause they're liable to break too!"
Evidently in the book for military spouses it states that all things mechanical should be off limits when your spouse leaves, because it will break. :~)
So Beccy hurries over and we take Sydaleigh to school. I get through to Isaak who is trying to instruct me on how to jump start the car, because it's pretty clear that the battery pooped out.
I make a mental list of everything he's telling me, not wanting to electrocute myself to smithereens.
And we head over to get Beccy's jumper cables, because ours are in Isaak's car which is at the clinic. Of course.
We can totally do this!! Just because we are a bunch of chics who've never jump started a car before doesn't mean we can't. Yeah, that's right, we GOT this.
Just making sure I go through my mental list of what to do so I don't get electrocuted.
"Okay, remember the list.... red, black, red, black. Red on positive. Black on negative. Don't touch the cables together or they will spark. Wait, spark or blow something up? In my mind he said blow something up. Better let Beccy attach the ones on her car first, just in case. :~) Whew, no sparks or explosions, I think it's safe for me to attach the second two now."
We totally did it! We jumped started the cars with no husbands! We are so awesome.
Oh, except that we didn't. Shoot. The battery was so beyond dead it wouldn't even charge.
After all that work...we risked our lives for nothing!
Now we had to call for back up. Rats, I was totally hoping to revel in my girl power. But I was not about to yank that battery out on my own, that had death written all over it. Even with the car off, it would find a way to electrocute me. :)
So, the morning and afternoon wears on and by dinner time we're able to get it fixed. Thank you Jesus! Beccy's husband very graciously went to the store and replaced the battery for us, and then installed it. And though and behold, once the new battery was in and the car was all lit up and running again, I not so surprisingly turn around to see the little light next to Sydaleigh's seat turned on. That little light she turned on on her way home from school on Friday, that stayed on all Saturday and Sunday because we didn't go anywhere all weekend. That little light, completely sucked the life from our car.
The lesson here-
don't let the kids turn on the lights in the car,
don't even let the kids touch the lights in the car even if they say they're not turning them on,
don't be surprised when the car stops running or the toilet explodes while Isaak is away, because apparently it's all triggered to malfunction then.
and thank the Lord profusely for great friends who will give up their mornings and evenings to help you. (thank you Beccy-you're a rockstar!)
Come on in...
Monday, March 14, 2011
Sunday, March 13, 2011
TDY, 24 and Barbies
Blah.
I came on here wanting to unload some thoughts and I've deleted everything I've typed so far.
Me and the girls are flying solo while Isaak gets some special training in the middle of no where right now. We have big plans while he's gone to eat lots of cereal for dinner, followed by chocolate shakes, and dance parties to Mamma Mia.
I have big plans on reading The Voice in the Wind, which I just got from the library, and watching as much 24 as possible. I tried to tell myself that I would wait to watch them until Isaak came home, since that's our new favorite obsession...but I just can't go ten days without my 24 fix. It's bad. I stayed up till 1am last night (would of only been midnight but stupid day light savings sucked an extra hour from me.) And it's even more pressing that I watch them since Netflix is going to be taking them off my instant view in twenty days. So glad I didn't jump on the 24 wagon when it came out 9 years ago...I would have been driven to insanity having to wait every week to watch them!
Marvi is coming down with a little cold so we stayed home from church this morning. Poor girl has forgotten how to blow into a tissue; every time I ask her she just sucks it all back up. That snot is liable to be in there till she's five the rates she's at.
Sydaleigh climbed out of bed a minute after I left her room last night, followed by Marvelly and before I knew it I was pulling what remains of my collector barbies out of my closet and looking at them with the girls. Over the past two years I've been slowly taking one down at at time and giving them to the girls to play with. I've had some of these Barbies for 20+ years, and they've just sat in their boxes, only to be looked at and never played with. I decided a few years ago when Sydaleigh first discovered them and I saw her eyes bulge out of her head, that I would give them to the girls. What good is a toy if it's never played with. I want to see my girls delight in them, rather than just collect dust because they might be worth a few bucks. They're not worth more than the joy my girls will have in playing with them, that's for sure.
While I took them down I forgot what I even had up there. I found a Barbie Odette from Swan Lake with wings that light up. Another Rapunzal. Holiday one's galore. A Talk of the Town. Looking at them made me ever so thankful for my mom, and how she delighted in buying me special things. And now I get to enjoy them with my own kids.
Kinda surreal.
Somedays I think back and I'm ten years old again, sitting on my daybed, looking at my soft green walls covered in hockey posters, and looking up at the long wooden shelf my dad built for me to store all my special barbies. I'd play with my barbies for a while, and then bust out my slew of hockey cards. Back and forth I'd go, equally delighted in both. And then I hear giggles, or screaming, and I'm transported back to my adult life as a mother and wife. Crazy how fast life changes. But I still have it all, stored safely away in my closet. The barbies, and the hundreds of hockey cards. A gentle reminder of my time as a child. Well, except now new little children are playing with some of the barbies in their bedroom. And, who knows, maybe one day I'll have a son who loves sports and I can give him my old hockey cards, to look at and sort through like I once did.
It's a beautiful cycle.
And I'm off to revel in it.
I came on here wanting to unload some thoughts and I've deleted everything I've typed so far.
Me and the girls are flying solo while Isaak gets some special training in the middle of no where right now. We have big plans while he's gone to eat lots of cereal for dinner, followed by chocolate shakes, and dance parties to Mamma Mia.
I have big plans on reading The Voice in the Wind, which I just got from the library, and watching as much 24 as possible. I tried to tell myself that I would wait to watch them until Isaak came home, since that's our new favorite obsession...but I just can't go ten days without my 24 fix. It's bad. I stayed up till 1am last night (would of only been midnight but stupid day light savings sucked an extra hour from me.) And it's even more pressing that I watch them since Netflix is going to be taking them off my instant view in twenty days. So glad I didn't jump on the 24 wagon when it came out 9 years ago...I would have been driven to insanity having to wait every week to watch them!
Marvi is coming down with a little cold so we stayed home from church this morning. Poor girl has forgotten how to blow into a tissue; every time I ask her she just sucks it all back up. That snot is liable to be in there till she's five the rates she's at.
Sydaleigh climbed out of bed a minute after I left her room last night, followed by Marvelly and before I knew it I was pulling what remains of my collector barbies out of my closet and looking at them with the girls. Over the past two years I've been slowly taking one down at at time and giving them to the girls to play with. I've had some of these Barbies for 20+ years, and they've just sat in their boxes, only to be looked at and never played with. I decided a few years ago when Sydaleigh first discovered them and I saw her eyes bulge out of her head, that I would give them to the girls. What good is a toy if it's never played with. I want to see my girls delight in them, rather than just collect dust because they might be worth a few bucks. They're not worth more than the joy my girls will have in playing with them, that's for sure.
While I took them down I forgot what I even had up there. I found a Barbie Odette from Swan Lake with wings that light up. Another Rapunzal. Holiday one's galore. A Talk of the Town. Looking at them made me ever so thankful for my mom, and how she delighted in buying me special things. And now I get to enjoy them with my own kids.
Kinda surreal.
Somedays I think back and I'm ten years old again, sitting on my daybed, looking at my soft green walls covered in hockey posters, and looking up at the long wooden shelf my dad built for me to store all my special barbies. I'd play with my barbies for a while, and then bust out my slew of hockey cards. Back and forth I'd go, equally delighted in both. And then I hear giggles, or screaming, and I'm transported back to my adult life as a mother and wife. Crazy how fast life changes. But I still have it all, stored safely away in my closet. The barbies, and the hundreds of hockey cards. A gentle reminder of my time as a child. Well, except now new little children are playing with some of the barbies in their bedroom. And, who knows, maybe one day I'll have a son who loves sports and I can give him my old hockey cards, to look at and sort through like I once did.
It's a beautiful cycle.
And I'm off to revel in it.
Tuesday, March 8, 2011
Dr. apt. #1 for my thyroid
Went to see my doctor yesterday afternoon for my thyroid. There wasn't a whole lot he could do, or really tell me at this appointment since he doesn't specialize in dealing with thyroids.
But, it was still productive.....
-he put in a referral for me to be seen with an endocrinologist, which is what I was praying for.
-he also put in an order for me to have an ultrasound of my thyroid, which I'll be having done tomorrow afternoon. He said the ultrasound will help show how large my thyroid is, if there's any masses, and whatever else they look for. Praying for a normal looking thyroid, and, no masses, obviously.
-he also wrote e a prescription for beta blockers to reduce my heart rate until I can be seen by my endo and start on some treatment. I've yet to take the beta blockers, much to Isaak's dismay, he doesn't understand why I just won't take the medicine if it will help me feel better. And quite frankly, neither do I?! But I'm nervous to be on medicine that's sole purpose is to affect my heart from beating. And until I have clear direction and peace from the Lord I can't get myself to take them. So, praying for the Lord's guidance and peace with this medicine.
-need to make sure I'm getting plenty of calcium b/c having hyperthyroidism makes your bones weak and susceptible to osteoporosis.
-but good news is the doctor told me he's not concerned about my heart being damaged from the prolonged untreated tachycardia. He said typically heart rates at 130bpm don't usually cause damage, it's just really uncomfortable. So, another answered prayer as I was worried about the strain this was having on my heart. Praying he knows what he's talking about! Believing that he does!
So, this was step one. Next up is my ultrasound tomorrow.
Praying the Lord's peace would continue to rule my heart.
But, it was still productive.....
-he put in a referral for me to be seen with an endocrinologist, which is what I was praying for.
-he also put in an order for me to have an ultrasound of my thyroid, which I'll be having done tomorrow afternoon. He said the ultrasound will help show how large my thyroid is, if there's any masses, and whatever else they look for. Praying for a normal looking thyroid, and, no masses, obviously.
-he also wrote e a prescription for beta blockers to reduce my heart rate until I can be seen by my endo and start on some treatment. I've yet to take the beta blockers, much to Isaak's dismay, he doesn't understand why I just won't take the medicine if it will help me feel better. And quite frankly, neither do I?! But I'm nervous to be on medicine that's sole purpose is to affect my heart from beating. And until I have clear direction and peace from the Lord I can't get myself to take them. So, praying for the Lord's guidance and peace with this medicine.
-need to make sure I'm getting plenty of calcium b/c having hyperthyroidism makes your bones weak and susceptible to osteoporosis.
-but good news is the doctor told me he's not concerned about my heart being damaged from the prolonged untreated tachycardia. He said typically heart rates at 130bpm don't usually cause damage, it's just really uncomfortable. So, another answered prayer as I was worried about the strain this was having on my heart. Praying he knows what he's talking about! Believing that he does!
So, this was step one. Next up is my ultrasound tomorrow.
Praying the Lord's peace would continue to rule my heart.
Monday, March 7, 2011
Mamma Mia, here we go again!
We have been waiting for this night for practically a year. Months and months and months ago Liz snatched up ten tickets to Mamma Mia at the Orpheum and last night was the.night. So off we went with ten of us in tow, and we had a ball!
First we headed over to Hiro 88 for dinner before the show. And as usual, we really know how to empty some plates, let me tell ya! So good, perfect atmosphere, delicious food. It was the perfect place to start off the night.
We ended up leaving the restaurant, late, and had to make a mad dash to the theater. Seriously, a mad dash, our car load was running down the street, in heels, in an attempt not to miss even one minute. We got there with minutes to spare. Fashionably right on time. :~)
All through the performance I was assaulted with memories of polyester, big hair, and bright blue eye shadow, recalling the last time I went to pay tribute to Mamma Mia and Abba via Bjorn Again at Papillion's amphitheater. It was a wild night then, full of dancing and laughing and crazy looks from strangers who would never be caught dead wearing 70's attire in the 21st century. So glad I have friends who don't care about that kind of stuff. :~) And so glad I had another memorable night celebrating some Abba love with new friends this time.
Last night was a little more tame, due to the fact that it was in a theater, and a play was technically going on, but it was just as fun. After the final act the cast came out and bowed, and then the whole ensemble assembled on stage to treat the audience to three songs- Mamma Mia, Dancing Queen, and Waterloo. There wasn't a non-sequined material on them! Head to toe in fabulous 70's pantsuits! Even the dudes. :) My only regret was that we didn't have aisle seats, so I was trapped in the middle of my row, unable to venture out to the freedom the aisle held to dance without restrain. Next time I'm sittin' on the aisle. But other than having to restrain these dancin' feet...it was flippin GREAT!!!
I'm surprised to say that I actually loved the play a hundred times more than I loved the movie. It really was so.much.better. All of the characters were spot on. The singing was superb, the dancing, the jokes, facial expressions, the quick little interactions between characters... all of it complimented every element of the story.
And hands down the star of the show was Donna. Her voice was IN-sane. And the pinnacle of her performance came during the scene that she sings Winner Takes It All. That scene where she serenades Sam was so moving and powerful I wanted to cry. Meryl Streep had nothin' on this chic! She brought that song to life with her gut wrenching rendition and made that probably my favorite part of the show. Well, it was probably tied with Money Money Money. The whole cast participated during this scene where Donna performed that number. Oh my gosh, it was so good. I loved that whole choreographed dance number, their movement on the stage, their interaction with Donna, ahhh, so good! So so good.
Sofie's best was What's the Name of the Game. Which I was not expecting but I love that the play performs more songs than the movie. There were five more songs included in the play than the movie. Dude, cha ching!! I want to go see it again and again and again!!
Ahhh, such a good night. Loved every minute of it. Had so much fun with these ladies!
at Beccy's before the show
First we headed over to Hiro 88 for dinner before the show. And as usual, we really know how to empty some plates, let me tell ya! So good, perfect atmosphere, delicious food. It was the perfect place to start off the night.
All through the performance I was assaulted with memories of polyester, big hair, and bright blue eye shadow, recalling the last time I went to pay tribute to Mamma Mia and Abba via Bjorn Again at Papillion's amphitheater. It was a wild night then, full of dancing and laughing and crazy looks from strangers who would never be caught dead wearing 70's attire in the 21st century. So glad I have friends who don't care about that kind of stuff. :~) And so glad I had another memorable night celebrating some Abba love with new friends this time.
Last night was a little more tame, due to the fact that it was in a theater, and a play was technically going on, but it was just as fun. After the final act the cast came out and bowed, and then the whole ensemble assembled on stage to treat the audience to three songs- Mamma Mia, Dancing Queen, and Waterloo. There wasn't a non-sequined material on them! Head to toe in fabulous 70's pantsuits! Even the dudes. :) My only regret was that we didn't have aisle seats, so I was trapped in the middle of my row, unable to venture out to the freedom the aisle held to dance without restrain. Next time I'm sittin' on the aisle. But other than having to restrain these dancin' feet...it was flippin GREAT!!!
I'm surprised to say that I actually loved the play a hundred times more than I loved the movie. It really was so.much.better. All of the characters were spot on. The singing was superb, the dancing, the jokes, facial expressions, the quick little interactions between characters... all of it complimented every element of the story.
And hands down the star of the show was Donna. Her voice was IN-sane. And the pinnacle of her performance came during the scene that she sings Winner Takes It All. That scene where she serenades Sam was so moving and powerful I wanted to cry. Meryl Streep had nothin' on this chic! She brought that song to life with her gut wrenching rendition and made that probably my favorite part of the show. Well, it was probably tied with Money Money Money. The whole cast participated during this scene where Donna performed that number. Oh my gosh, it was so good. I loved that whole choreographed dance number, their movement on the stage, their interaction with Donna, ahhh, so good! So so good.
Sofie's best was What's the Name of the Game. Which I was not expecting but I love that the play performs more songs than the movie. There were five more songs included in the play than the movie. Dude, cha ching!! I want to go see it again and again and again!!
Ahhh, such a good night. Loved every minute of it. Had so much fun with these ladies!
Wednesday, March 2, 2011
Between places
"We, too, are between places at times.
The Israelites were between a victory and a defeat, yet they did not know it."
"We, too, are between places at times."
I read these words last week in my bible study. I read them again early Monday morning. And I thought to myself..."I wonder what place I'm between right now? Is a defeat looming up ahead that I can't see? A victory perhaps? Something unexpected?"
The truth is, we're always in between places. Not at times, but always. We can never fully see what's around the corner. We don't fully know what tomorrow holds. We can plan our lives out as best we can, but we can't plan for everything.
And that's where faith comes in. Putting faith in the LORD to guide you through all the in betweens. And then standing in that faith once you get to the place the LORD is leading.
Faith without works is dead.
The magnitude of this has really started to sink in these last six weeks. The Isrealites could say all.they.want, "sure God, we trust you," but if they never shouted out in faith, a shout of faith that would bring the walls of Jericho down around them...it would have meant nothing.
They could say that they had faith until their faces turned blue, but if they never stepped one foot in the raging Jordan, a step of faith into a churning sea, a step of faith that would halt the waters....it would have meant nothing. Nothing.
And they would have stood there, defeated, by their own inability to take a step of faith, in an ever faithful God.
Because in order for God to supernaturally bring down the walls of Jericho, He required the people to shout believing that He would.
In order for God to supernaturally part the Jordan river, He required the people to step into it, believing that He would.
I can tell God all I want, "of course I trust you!" But if I never step into my Jordan, my faith is dead. My faith needs to respond to God believing that He will and He has, even if I don't know what His will entails.
Yesterday, on a routine doctors appointment to check out a cyst, something completely unrelated was discovered. Something that I have been having symptoms for for years. And it was always dismissed. Always brushed off. No one took into account my concerns. Said I was perfectly normal. Little did I know my normal wasn't normal at all. I've never been a person who's been plagued with sickness. I have lived a remarkably healthy life. No complaints except for a yearly cold, or a headache once a month. Except for this pesky symptom. A racing heart rate. Between 115-130bpm. My heart beats so fast and so forceful I can feel it every minute of every twenty four hour day. It will keep my from falling asleep. It will wake me up in the morning. It makes my body run internally as if I was constantly doing aerobic exercises. There is no break. There is no relief. Constantly racing. An ever present reminder that something feels wrong, but always being told that it's not.
Thanks be to my Lord and Savior the doctor I saw yesterday, who was seeing me for something unrelated, agreed to order a blood test for me, after hearing my concerns again over my clocked 130bpm. It the tests are normal, a machine will tell me. If not normal, she will tell me.
A couple hours later, which is a down right miracle in military time when it comes to getting any sort of information...
the doctor called.
Blood tests came back. Not normal.
My thyroid is running out of whack.
I have hyperthyroidism.
Which she said explains my incessantly rapid heart rate. Which explains why I can always feel it beating. Which she assured me is not normal.
Finally. An explanation. Not an explanation I was prepared for. I wasn't prepared to hear something was wrong with me even though it felt like something was. But still. An explanation. A explanation behind my racing heart, my trembling hands, being hungry every hour, and likely a slew of other things.
But that's all I know. My next step is an appointment on Monday to request a referral to be seen by an endocrinologist. And, that's as far as I can see.
I don't know much at this point but I do know there will be further testing to try to discover the cause of my thyroids malfunction. And then treatment in the form of lifelong medication or surgery(with lifelong medication) depending on my severity.
It's scary to find out something is wrong inside you. Especially when nothing's ever been wrong with you. And to know there is nothing you can do to fix it yourself. To feel broken. Weak. And helpless.
A great position to be in to depend on God. A great position to be in to see if I've been all talk...or if I really have the faith I say I have.
I don't know much of what my future with this entails....but right now I know the Lord is leading me to my Jericho. And I can either gaze up at those gigantic terrifying walls and choose to stand in fear, or.....I can step out in faith and shout a victory cry to my God who has already won my battle...and watch the walls crumple at my feet.
So I'm choosing faith right now. I'm choosing to approach my Jericho and shout forth in victorious praise because my God is bigger than my problem. And I don't need to know the outcome to know that my King has already conquered it. He holds my heart in His hands. And no harm can come to me there.
The Israelites were between a victory and a defeat, yet they did not know it."
"We, too, are between places at times."
I read these words last week in my bible study. I read them again early Monday morning. And I thought to myself..."I wonder what place I'm between right now? Is a defeat looming up ahead that I can't see? A victory perhaps? Something unexpected?"
The truth is, we're always in between places. Not at times, but always. We can never fully see what's around the corner. We don't fully know what tomorrow holds. We can plan our lives out as best we can, but we can't plan for everything.
And that's where faith comes in. Putting faith in the LORD to guide you through all the in betweens. And then standing in that faith once you get to the place the LORD is leading.
Faith without works is dead.
The magnitude of this has really started to sink in these last six weeks. The Isrealites could say all.they.want, "sure God, we trust you," but if they never shouted out in faith, a shout of faith that would bring the walls of Jericho down around them...it would have meant nothing.
They could say that they had faith until their faces turned blue, but if they never stepped one foot in the raging Jordan, a step of faith into a churning sea, a step of faith that would halt the waters....it would have meant nothing. Nothing.
And they would have stood there, defeated, by their own inability to take a step of faith, in an ever faithful God.
Because in order for God to supernaturally bring down the walls of Jericho, He required the people to shout believing that He would.
In order for God to supernaturally part the Jordan river, He required the people to step into it, believing that He would.
I can tell God all I want, "of course I trust you!" But if I never step into my Jordan, my faith is dead. My faith needs to respond to God believing that He will and He has, even if I don't know what His will entails.
Yesterday, on a routine doctors appointment to check out a cyst, something completely unrelated was discovered. Something that I have been having symptoms for for years. And it was always dismissed. Always brushed off. No one took into account my concerns. Said I was perfectly normal. Little did I know my normal wasn't normal at all. I've never been a person who's been plagued with sickness. I have lived a remarkably healthy life. No complaints except for a yearly cold, or a headache once a month. Except for this pesky symptom. A racing heart rate. Between 115-130bpm. My heart beats so fast and so forceful I can feel it every minute of every twenty four hour day. It will keep my from falling asleep. It will wake me up in the morning. It makes my body run internally as if I was constantly doing aerobic exercises. There is no break. There is no relief. Constantly racing. An ever present reminder that something feels wrong, but always being told that it's not.
Thanks be to my Lord and Savior the doctor I saw yesterday, who was seeing me for something unrelated, agreed to order a blood test for me, after hearing my concerns again over my clocked 130bpm. It the tests are normal, a machine will tell me. If not normal, she will tell me.
A couple hours later, which is a down right miracle in military time when it comes to getting any sort of information...
the doctor called.
Blood tests came back. Not normal.
My thyroid is running out of whack.
I have hyperthyroidism.
Which she said explains my incessantly rapid heart rate. Which explains why I can always feel it beating. Which she assured me is not normal.
Finally. An explanation. Not an explanation I was prepared for. I wasn't prepared to hear something was wrong with me even though it felt like something was. But still. An explanation. A explanation behind my racing heart, my trembling hands, being hungry every hour, and likely a slew of other things.
But that's all I know. My next step is an appointment on Monday to request a referral to be seen by an endocrinologist. And, that's as far as I can see.
I don't know much at this point but I do know there will be further testing to try to discover the cause of my thyroids malfunction. And then treatment in the form of lifelong medication or surgery(with lifelong medication) depending on my severity.
It's scary to find out something is wrong inside you. Especially when nothing's ever been wrong with you. And to know there is nothing you can do to fix it yourself. To feel broken. Weak. And helpless.
A great position to be in to depend on God. A great position to be in to see if I've been all talk...or if I really have the faith I say I have.
I don't know much of what my future with this entails....but right now I know the Lord is leading me to my Jericho. And I can either gaze up at those gigantic terrifying walls and choose to stand in fear, or.....I can step out in faith and shout a victory cry to my God who has already won my battle...and watch the walls crumple at my feet.
So I'm choosing faith right now. I'm choosing to approach my Jericho and shout forth in victorious praise because my God is bigger than my problem. And I don't need to know the outcome to know that my King has already conquered it. He holds my heart in His hands. And no harm can come to me there.
"Whoever dwells in the shelter of the Most High will rest in the shadow of the Almighty.
I will say of the LORD, “He is my refuge and my fortress, my God, in whom I trust.”
Surely he will save you from the fowler’s snare and from the deadly pestilence.
He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge;
He will cover you with his feathers, and under his wings you will find refuge;
his faithfulness will be your shield and rampart. You will not fear the terror of night, nor the arrow that flies by day, nor the pestilence that stalks in the darkness, nor the plague that destroys at midday. A thousand may fall at your side, ten thousand at your right hand, but it will not come near you. You will only observe with your eyes and see the punishment of the wicked.
If you say, “The LORD is my refuge,” and you make the Most High your dwelling, no harm will overtake you, no disaster will come near your tent.
For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
For he will command his angels concerning you to guard you in all your ways; they will lift you up in their hands, so that you will not strike your foot against a stone.
You will tread on the lion and the cobra; you will trample the great lion and the serpent.
“Because he loves me,” says the LORD, “I will rescue him; I will protect him, for he acknowledges my name. He will call on me, and I will answer him; I will be with him in trouble, I will deliver him and honor him. With long life I will satisfy him and show him my salvation.” Psalm 91
Heart
God felt it necessary to leave a subtle reminder of His love for me in my cake batter.
He's got my heart in His hands.
That's the safest place for it.
:~)
Monday, February 28, 2011
Marvelly at 3
We celebrated Marvelly's third birthday on Friday. It's crazy that the little baby of the family is already three. I'm still completely amazed how fast a year can go by. Or how fast three years can go by for that matter.
It's so cliche and every mother says it, but it really doesn't seem like that long ago that we brought her home from the hospital....
Her first day in the hospital she scratched herself on her left upper cheek and it scabbed over and eventually scarred. Today her cheek still carries the remains of that tiny little scratch from only one day old. I thought over time the scar would disappear, but it's only slightly faded. She will likely carry that little reminder of babyhood with her forever. So that even after all her baby teeth fall out and it appears she has nothing left on her from her baby years, every time I look at her I'll have that tiny little physical reminder she was in fact at one time...a baby.
I know she's only three. But Sydaleigh is five. Five. And soon Marvelly will be too. And before I know it I'll blink, and poof...they'll be grown ups. It's this knowledge that motivates me to give a little more at the end of the night when I feel like I'm on empty. To read one more story. Rub their back for one more minute. To be silly when I feel like being serious. To sing Disney music with them when I feel like being quiet. To dig into my imagination and play polly pockets when it feels like my make-believing skills have all but vanished for the day. These fleeting years of youth motivate me to give a little bit more because I know that my days to be silly, play polly pockets, make play-doh ice cream, read story books and sing Disney show tunes won't last forever.
So, in honor on my newly minted three year old....dig a little deeper. Because they won't be this small forever.....so check your grown up distractions at the door and go jump in a puddle!
Happy Birthday my little moonchkie! ( a nickname that started out as munchkin, but over time evolved into moonchkie. I don't know where I come up with this stuff sometimes.)
I made her a 101 Dalmatians cake after her favorite movie this year which she probably watched close to a hundred times.
We had a couple of friends over to celebrate her special day, eat some dessert and open some fun presents. One of which was an 80 piece 101 Dalmatian figurine set. $10 on Ebay. And quite possibly the best $10 I've ever spent. E-ver. The girls have never been entertained with a toy for as long as they are with these. I'm talkin' hours worth!
And as soon as Daddy got home we took the girls to the CIRCUS!! The Shrine's Circus was in town performing at the Civic Center and we happened to have free tickets, and we don't really pass up free...so yes please we will go watch some bears ride around on a motorcycle!( I don't ever remember going to the circus as a kid, even though I know i did, so I was just as excited to go and see some pretty bizarre things.)
It's truly amazing the things that you can not only train a human body to do...but an animal's as well. Getting a wild animal to jump through fire for fun. Dude.
And then of course...
I don't even have the muscle in my hands and arms to hang from the rings on a playground set...but some chic can hang from a rope by only her teeth. Dude. Duuuuudddde. How you do that?
And then of course I just ask why? Why???? Running in place on top of some moving contraption while jumping rope? Do you want to die?
28 lbs. (24%) 35 1/2 in. tall (14%)
still pint sized
still wearing some 12 month pants (when i realized that I had to box them up just on principal)
loves shrimp, any type of dipping sauce, hard boiled eggs, manicotti, and avocados (to which she sometimes calls Manicados. Hee hee)
her favorite movies this past year were 101 Dalmatians and Barbie 12 Dancing Princesses
fully potty trained-Hallelujah!
just recently got into Strawberry Shortcake with the long hair
talks in her sleep, a lot
knows all of her colors, alphabet song, shapes, and can count to 15ish
still working on drawing a straight line
aggravates Sydaleigh to know end
makes me fuming mad one second then has me buckled over in laughter the next
crosses her arms over her chest and tucks her chin down when she pouting
mimics Sydaleigh all.the.time.
is sure to do the exact opposite of what you tell her (especially Sydaleigh. as soon as Sydaleigh asks back for anything Marvelly has taken from her, it's sure to result in Marvelly running away laughing)
doesn't take too much seriously, unless she feels you've committed some sort of injustice to her, otherwise, she's all laughs all the time
is sure to run away if you pursue her, especaially if you're pursuing her to give back something she's taken, then she'll run away, laughing at you the whole way.
did I mention she doesn't take much seriously?
will not stay in the corner for nothin'
stutters over her w's and s's
likes to tell us what to say to her
the only time she's still is when she sleeps
continues to have a deep obsession with her blanket...she's our little Linus.
still gets milk at bedtime
when she's being corrected she'll tell us, "Stop it Mommy. Stop it Daddy. Stop.it."
and has more expressions than all of us combined
corrected herself from saying "Siyyayyee" to "Sydaleigh"-that made me pretty sad.
It's so cliche and every mother says it, but it really doesn't seem like that long ago that we brought her home from the hospital....
Her first day in the hospital she scratched herself on her left upper cheek and it scabbed over and eventually scarred. Today her cheek still carries the remains of that tiny little scratch from only one day old. I thought over time the scar would disappear, but it's only slightly faded. She will likely carry that little reminder of babyhood with her forever. So that even after all her baby teeth fall out and it appears she has nothing left on her from her baby years, every time I look at her I'll have that tiny little physical reminder she was in fact at one time...a baby.
I know she's only three. But Sydaleigh is five. Five. And soon Marvelly will be too. And before I know it I'll blink, and poof...they'll be grown ups. It's this knowledge that motivates me to give a little more at the end of the night when I feel like I'm on empty. To read one more story. Rub their back for one more minute. To be silly when I feel like being serious. To sing Disney music with them when I feel like being quiet. To dig into my imagination and play polly pockets when it feels like my make-believing skills have all but vanished for the day. These fleeting years of youth motivate me to give a little bit more because I know that my days to be silly, play polly pockets, make play-doh ice cream, read story books and sing Disney show tunes won't last forever.
So, in honor on my newly minted three year old....dig a little deeper. Because they won't be this small forever.....so check your grown up distractions at the door and go jump in a puddle!
Happy Birthday my little moonchkie! ( a nickname that started out as munchkin, but over time evolved into moonchkie. I don't know where I come up with this stuff sometimes.)
I made her a 101 Dalmatians cake after her favorite movie this year which she probably watched close to a hundred times.
We had a couple of friends over to celebrate her special day, eat some dessert and open some fun presents. One of which was an 80 piece 101 Dalmatian figurine set. $10 on Ebay. And quite possibly the best $10 I've ever spent. E-ver. The girls have never been entertained with a toy for as long as they are with these. I'm talkin' hours worth!
And as soon as Daddy got home we took the girls to the CIRCUS!! The Shrine's Circus was in town performing at the Civic Center and we happened to have free tickets, and we don't really pass up free...so yes please we will go watch some bears ride around on a motorcycle!( I don't ever remember going to the circus as a kid, even though I know i did, so I was just as excited to go and see some pretty bizarre things.)
see, really riding a motorcycle.
Sydaleigh got to ride an elephant and Marvi rode a pony downstairs in the petting zoo area. Not hesitant one bit!
(I love Isaak's face in the pic on the left!)
It's truly amazing the things that you can not only train a human body to do...but an animal's as well. Getting a wild animal to jump through fire for fun. Dude.
And then of course...
And then of course I just ask why? Why???? Running in place on top of some moving contraption while jumping rope? Do you want to die?
Like I said...we saw some pretty bizarre things. No bearded ladies though. Bummer.
But it was Awesome!
Happy Birthday my Marvi girl.
28 lbs. (24%) 35 1/2 in. tall (14%)
still pint sized
still wearing some 12 month pants (when i realized that I had to box them up just on principal)
loves shrimp, any type of dipping sauce, hard boiled eggs, manicotti, and avocados (to which she sometimes calls Manicados. Hee hee)
her favorite movies this past year were 101 Dalmatians and Barbie 12 Dancing Princesses
fully potty trained-Hallelujah!
just recently got into Strawberry Shortcake with the long hair
talks in her sleep, a lot
knows all of her colors, alphabet song, shapes, and can count to 15ish
still working on drawing a straight line
aggravates Sydaleigh to know end
makes me fuming mad one second then has me buckled over in laughter the next
crosses her arms over her chest and tucks her chin down when she pouting
mimics Sydaleigh all.the.time.
is sure to do the exact opposite of what you tell her (especially Sydaleigh. as soon as Sydaleigh asks back for anything Marvelly has taken from her, it's sure to result in Marvelly running away laughing)
doesn't take too much seriously, unless she feels you've committed some sort of injustice to her, otherwise, she's all laughs all the time
is sure to run away if you pursue her, especaially if you're pursuing her to give back something she's taken, then she'll run away, laughing at you the whole way.
did I mention she doesn't take much seriously?
will not stay in the corner for nothin'
stutters over her w's and s's
likes to tell us what to say to her
the only time she's still is when she sleeps
continues to have a deep obsession with her blanket...she's our little Linus.
still gets milk at bedtime
when she's being corrected she'll tell us, "Stop it Mommy. Stop it Daddy. Stop.it."
and has more expressions than all of us combined
corrected herself from saying "Siyyayyee" to "Sydaleigh"-that made me pretty sad.
Thursday, February 24, 2011
Not goin' out without a fight
We went to the clinic this afternoon for Marvi's well visit.
Nothing.
Isaak met up with us about twenty minutes later.
Still nothing.
By the time we left the immunization clinic, within a span of about 15-20 minutes.
Covered.
There were big white fluffy snowflakes being dumped out of the sky at monstrous proportions. And the brown earth that I had grown used to seeing the past two weeks lay once again covered under snow.
Upon seeing this Sydaleigh literally started crying. She cried all the way to the car telling me, "I thought spring was coming!" in her most dejected voice possible.
My sentiments exactly honey.
But I know Nebraska too well to think that two weeks of relative bliss in the middle of winter could mean spring was in the foreseeable future. Nebraska does not take kindly to being ripped out of weeks worth of winter and general misery.
So, if this grand state has to dump henoious amounts of snow in a matter of minutes to make up for what it lost the past two weeks...by golly she will.
Nothing.
Isaak met up with us about twenty minutes later.
Still nothing.
By the time we left the immunization clinic, within a span of about 15-20 minutes.
Covered.
There were big white fluffy snowflakes being dumped out of the sky at monstrous proportions. And the brown earth that I had grown used to seeing the past two weeks lay once again covered under snow.
Upon seeing this Sydaleigh literally started crying. She cried all the way to the car telling me, "I thought spring was coming!" in her most dejected voice possible.
My sentiments exactly honey.
But I know Nebraska too well to think that two weeks of relative bliss in the middle of winter could mean spring was in the foreseeable future. Nebraska does not take kindly to being ripped out of weeks worth of winter and general misery.
So, if this grand state has to dump henoious amounts of snow in a matter of minutes to make up for what it lost the past two weeks...by golly she will.
(an hour's worth of snow and not a speck of grass in sight.)
This winter is not goin' out without a fight.
Sunday, February 20, 2011
My one word for 2011
I was given a challenge after Christmas. A challenge from my sweetie Bekah.
A one word challenge.
Just one word for 2011 to focus on.
Sounded easy enough.
So instead of another new year's resolution I was sure to fail, and forget, just as soon as I committed myself to it...I decided to pick one word.
One word to focus on this year.
One word, to really challenge me.
Of course there are thousands upon thousands of words out there, and I had been thinking for the past couple days after Christmas what that word would be....because I wanted a good one.
But, it wasn't until I was saying goodbye to Bekah in the airport, that God planted my heart on what it would be. My word for 2011. That one word that would spur me on these next twelve months...
SPECIFIC.
That's my word for this year. We already have a love hate relationship because SPECIFIC doesn't come easy for me. It doesn't come easy in my personal life, and I've especially struggled with it in my prayer life.
I struggle with it in my personal life, because well, if I'm being totally honest I want my family to be mind readers. I do. I want them to be able to read my mind. I don't want to have to always tell everybody what I want. What to do. All.the.time. I want them to just know. Without having to be told, or reminded, over and over and over. I realize the absurdity to this way of thinking, but absurd as it may be...I do it! And I subject my family to it. Because rather than getting aggravated, when my family doesn't read my mind and do exactly as I want and think they should...I could just tell them. I could just be specific.
And then I struggle with this in my prayer life, not because I expect God to be a mind reader...(tee hee, that's one I don't have to worry about!)...but because I tell myself over and over and over,
"God, I don't know what's best for me. You do. So I'm not gonna pray over anything specific. I'm just gonna pray in a generalized fashion. I'm gonna be a neutral prayer."
It's funny because I only struggle with this in prayers concerning me. When it comes to other people, I have no problem laying out the specfic desires I have for them. But me....not so easy.
And I've come to realize that that's no way to approach God. While I do think it's important to approach God with absolute humility and recognize are limitedness in knowing what's best for us, praying neutral all the time is a cop out.
For example....."God, I don't know what will be best for our family with this adoption. I don't want to pray for a specific boy or girl, because you know my family better than I do, and you know whether a boy or girl will be right for us. I don't want to pray one way, and not have that be the right way in the end. You know better than me, so just send us whichever. I trust you. "
Seems good. Seemed like a good way to approach my life. Just surrender it all to Him. Never have an opinion. Never have a specific desire. Or a specific want. Let God make every decision so I wouldn't have to think. So I wouldn't ever have to make a wrong choice. A choice that didn't line up with what God had planned for me. I wanted to take away any opportunity for human error. I wanted to take away any opportunity to choose wrong. So I became a neutral prayer.
"Whatever God, anything is fine so long as that's what you want for me."
"Whatever."
"Whatever."
"You decide."
And on and on it went. For years.
But then I also came to realize, through some much needed God revelation....that I've also been praying this way....
so that I could avoid disappointment.
I don't want to pray wrong....and I don't want to be disappointed when I don't receive what I've been praying for.
Yikes.
It's hard to pray and pray and pray over something, something that you really really want, and truly desire, and then have God turn around and tell you,
"no, I'm sorry."
To spend that much energy into praying for something, and then be told "no." Who wants that?
Not me. I don't want to become emotionally invested in praying over something just for God to tell me "no", and be disappointed because I didn't get what I wanted.
Because now, you have to deal with disappointment, then you have to learn to let go out that dream or desire you had for your life, and then accept that God had something else in mind for you all along.
Like this adoption. I convinced myself that I didn't care whether we were blessed with either a son or a daughter. I prayed neutrally, for God to bless us with either. God's choice. But all along....Sydaleigh has been praying for a brother. A brother. This sweet little child has been going before God, laying her specific desires at His feet. For a brother. That challenged me. This whole darn thing has challenged me.
Praying specifically is hard. Because it requires me to trust God way more than I ever did when I was praying generally. I said, "I trust you, I trust your decision for me"... but if I really trusted God, I would pour my heart out to Him and tell Him what I really want, (because He already knows anyways, I'm not fooling Him by keeping it to myself)...and give Him the opportunity to grant that request, or deny it. Even if that means facing disappointment. Even if that means becoming emotionally invested. Waiting expectantly for God to grant my request. That takes more trust.
I'm going through Luke right now in bible study and time after time I have read across scripture
Luke 11:5-13, Jesus urging boldness and persistence in prayer,
Luke 18:41, Jesus asked him, "what do you want me to do for you?" "Lord, I want to see," he replied
Luke 21:36, again encouraging boldness
Luke 22:42, "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done."
Jesus himself approached God with a very specific prayer. A very specific prayer. He didn't shy away from laying His desires at God's feet. He came, and fully poured out His heart in prayer, not holding back. But what I love is that while He fully poured out His heart's desires, He recognized God's final authority and was fully surrended to the LORD'S will. Even if it wasn't what He prayed for. Even if He had to endure the disappointment of a prayer answered "no." He didn't hold back. He fully gave God the opportunity to answer His prayer either "yes" or either "no." But fully accepting whatever answer He was given.
Now that's trust.
Not exactly what I've been doing. Not exactly how I've been approaching God in prayer. I wanted to avoid any chance of hurt or pain or disappointment, so I avoided praying for anything specific.
And, God is seeking to change that in my life this year. Seeking to strip me of this whacked out thinking, and come to Him just as Jesus did. Vulnerable. And just as Jesus taught us to do. Expecting.
So that's my word for the year. SPECIFIC. It's gonna be a doosey. God has used it to push me and stretch me more than I wanted to be and it's only February!
I have had some things on my heart that God finally encouraged me to stop being neutral on, and be specific on. So, in these past two months I have prayed continually for two specific things. One concerning our adoption, that the Lord would bless our family with a blessed baby boy, (whether He grants that prayer remains to be seen :~) ), and the other for a friend. Just recently I began praying for two other very specific things...one of which God answered on Friday. :~)
A one word challenge.
Just one word for 2011 to focus on.
Sounded easy enough.
So instead of another new year's resolution I was sure to fail, and forget, just as soon as I committed myself to it...I decided to pick one word.
One word to focus on this year.
One word, to really challenge me.
Of course there are thousands upon thousands of words out there, and I had been thinking for the past couple days after Christmas what that word would be....because I wanted a good one.
But, it wasn't until I was saying goodbye to Bekah in the airport, that God planted my heart on what it would be. My word for 2011. That one word that would spur me on these next twelve months...
SPECIFIC.
That's my word for this year. We already have a love hate relationship because SPECIFIC doesn't come easy for me. It doesn't come easy in my personal life, and I've especially struggled with it in my prayer life.
I struggle with it in my personal life, because well, if I'm being totally honest I want my family to be mind readers. I do. I want them to be able to read my mind. I don't want to have to always tell everybody what I want. What to do. All.the.time. I want them to just know. Without having to be told, or reminded, over and over and over. I realize the absurdity to this way of thinking, but absurd as it may be...I do it! And I subject my family to it. Because rather than getting aggravated, when my family doesn't read my mind and do exactly as I want and think they should...I could just tell them. I could just be specific.
And then I struggle with this in my prayer life, not because I expect God to be a mind reader...(tee hee, that's one I don't have to worry about!)...but because I tell myself over and over and over,
"God, I don't know what's best for me. You do. So I'm not gonna pray over anything specific. I'm just gonna pray in a generalized fashion. I'm gonna be a neutral prayer."
It's funny because I only struggle with this in prayers concerning me. When it comes to other people, I have no problem laying out the specfic desires I have for them. But me....not so easy.
And I've come to realize that that's no way to approach God. While I do think it's important to approach God with absolute humility and recognize are limitedness in knowing what's best for us, praying neutral all the time is a cop out.
For example....."God, I don't know what will be best for our family with this adoption. I don't want to pray for a specific boy or girl, because you know my family better than I do, and you know whether a boy or girl will be right for us. I don't want to pray one way, and not have that be the right way in the end. You know better than me, so just send us whichever. I trust you. "
Seems good. Seemed like a good way to approach my life. Just surrender it all to Him. Never have an opinion. Never have a specific desire. Or a specific want. Let God make every decision so I wouldn't have to think. So I wouldn't ever have to make a wrong choice. A choice that didn't line up with what God had planned for me. I wanted to take away any opportunity for human error. I wanted to take away any opportunity to choose wrong. So I became a neutral prayer.
"Whatever God, anything is fine so long as that's what you want for me."
"Whatever."
"Whatever."
"You decide."
And on and on it went. For years.
But then I also came to realize, through some much needed God revelation....that I've also been praying this way....
so that I could avoid disappointment.
I don't want to pray wrong....and I don't want to be disappointed when I don't receive what I've been praying for.
Yikes.
It's hard to pray and pray and pray over something, something that you really really want, and truly desire, and then have God turn around and tell you,
"no, I'm sorry."
To spend that much energy into praying for something, and then be told "no." Who wants that?
Not me. I don't want to become emotionally invested in praying over something just for God to tell me "no", and be disappointed because I didn't get what I wanted.
Because now, you have to deal with disappointment, then you have to learn to let go out that dream or desire you had for your life, and then accept that God had something else in mind for you all along.
Like this adoption. I convinced myself that I didn't care whether we were blessed with either a son or a daughter. I prayed neutrally, for God to bless us with either. God's choice. But all along....Sydaleigh has been praying for a brother. A brother. This sweet little child has been going before God, laying her specific desires at His feet. For a brother. That challenged me. This whole darn thing has challenged me.
Praying specifically is hard. Because it requires me to trust God way more than I ever did when I was praying generally. I said, "I trust you, I trust your decision for me"... but if I really trusted God, I would pour my heart out to Him and tell Him what I really want, (because He already knows anyways, I'm not fooling Him by keeping it to myself)...and give Him the opportunity to grant that request, or deny it. Even if that means facing disappointment. Even if that means becoming emotionally invested. Waiting expectantly for God to grant my request. That takes more trust.
I'm going through Luke right now in bible study and time after time I have read across scripture
Luke 11:5-13, Jesus urging boldness and persistence in prayer,
Luke 18:41, Jesus asked him, "what do you want me to do for you?" "Lord, I want to see," he replied
Luke 21:36, again encouraging boldness
Luke 22:42, "Father, if you are willing, take this cup from me; yet not my will, but yours be done."
Jesus himself approached God with a very specific prayer. A very specific prayer. He didn't shy away from laying His desires at God's feet. He came, and fully poured out His heart in prayer, not holding back. But what I love is that while He fully poured out His heart's desires, He recognized God's final authority and was fully surrended to the LORD'S will. Even if it wasn't what He prayed for. Even if He had to endure the disappointment of a prayer answered "no." He didn't hold back. He fully gave God the opportunity to answer His prayer either "yes" or either "no." But fully accepting whatever answer He was given.
Now that's trust.
Not exactly what I've been doing. Not exactly how I've been approaching God in prayer. I wanted to avoid any chance of hurt or pain or disappointment, so I avoided praying for anything specific.
And, God is seeking to change that in my life this year. Seeking to strip me of this whacked out thinking, and come to Him just as Jesus did. Vulnerable. And just as Jesus taught us to do. Expecting.
So that's my word for the year. SPECIFIC. It's gonna be a doosey. God has used it to push me and stretch me more than I wanted to be and it's only February!
I have had some things on my heart that God finally encouraged me to stop being neutral on, and be specific on. So, in these past two months I have prayed continually for two specific things. One concerning our adoption, that the Lord would bless our family with a blessed baby boy, (whether He grants that prayer remains to be seen :~) ), and the other for a friend. Just recently I began praying for two other very specific things...one of which God answered on Friday. :~)
Thursday, February 17, 2011
Girl hormones
I could blame it on being tired. I could. We played outside more today than we have in the past two months combined. The girls were tired tonight.
But right now. This is not tired.
This is a small glimpse of what it is going to be like from here...to forever.
Sydaleigh is currently crying...no no no....more like bawling....deeply sobbing...because Daddy doesn't like grapes, and she does, and that hurts her feelings.
Oh my.
At bath time she was bawling because she thought Isaak yelled at her, when in fact, he did not.
During story time fifteen minutes later she started bawling, again, because Marvelly bumped her head on the bed and it scared her.
And now, after we calmed her down for the second time, I rubbed her back, prayed, we left their room in cheery moods, I walked out and she started all over again.
Because Isaak doesn't like grapes.
Oh my.
Yes, she is tired. But this is some serious girlie hormones wrecking havoc on my poor little first born.
I have been slowly noticing these erratic cry fests for the past couple months, since turning five, so I'm blaming it on her five year old hormones.
Who ever said that hormones don't kick in until puberty years...well, that's a load of junk. Because they start showing a whole lot sooner than that.
I have a five year old crying over grapes right now to prove it.
Poor Isaak. He has no idea what he's in for. :~)
These girlie hormones are not for the faint of heart.
But right now. This is not tired.
This is a small glimpse of what it is going to be like from here...to forever.
Sydaleigh is currently crying...no no no....more like bawling....deeply sobbing...because Daddy doesn't like grapes, and she does, and that hurts her feelings.
Oh my.
At bath time she was bawling because she thought Isaak yelled at her, when in fact, he did not.
During story time fifteen minutes later she started bawling, again, because Marvelly bumped her head on the bed and it scared her.
And now, after we calmed her down for the second time, I rubbed her back, prayed, we left their room in cheery moods, I walked out and she started all over again.
Because Isaak doesn't like grapes.
Oh my.
Yes, she is tired. But this is some serious girlie hormones wrecking havoc on my poor little first born.
I have been slowly noticing these erratic cry fests for the past couple months, since turning five, so I'm blaming it on her five year old hormones.
Who ever said that hormones don't kick in until puberty years...well, that's a load of junk. Because they start showing a whole lot sooner than that.
I have a five year old crying over grapes right now to prove it.
Poor Isaak. He has no idea what he's in for. :~)
These girlie hormones are not for the faint of heart.
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