Moving update, thyroid update, and freedom in Christ

This past week has felt like a whirlwind. So many things have been happening and not happening but in the midst of all the chaos and activity, God is good. He holds us, sustains us, and brings fresh life to these weary bones.

Isaak called me from work last Tuesday afternoon while I was outside in the back, swinging in my swing, reading a book, and watching the girls run and play without jackets on yet another bizarre 60 degree day in the middle of what is suppose to be winter here.

He was very agitated and I could almost feel his fumes through the phone when he told me he was just informed that TMO was not available to move our household goods until the last day in February.  Two weeks after we needed them to come. At a time when we were already suppose to be settled in D.C. And since we still didn't have orders yet and couldn't actually schedule the movers without that invaluable piece of paper, it would likely be into March before they would move us.

Well, that throws a wrench in our plans!

Except, when he told me this new news, I surprised myself when I started laughing. Lau.ghing, into the phone, to my husband who was ready to breathe fire.

"Really?! You're kidding?! No?! Bah ha ha ha ha! Of course they're not available to move us! Of course they're not!! Ha ha ha ha ha!"

Isaak was silent in the phone when I think he was pausing to consider whether his wife had finally gone mad.

I laughed again and said, "Oh, this doesn't surprise me in the least." Followed by more laughter.

Isaak responds, "I don't see the humor in this," very seriously. Clearly not finding my laughter at the curveball comforting.

"Oh, just give it another week, and another curveball....and you'll be laughing with me!"

After we talked a few more minutes I finally hung up and took a minute to take mental stock of my odd initial reaction. No, I had not gone mad. I actually felt....giddy. Jubilant even.

The whole situation had just reached the point of being so out of our hands....I felt free. There was absolutely nothing we could do. We were at the mercy of so many people at this point, so many factors, it just made me smile.

And for maybe the first time ever I had responded to a possible stressful situation the way I always prayed I'd be able to some day.....with initial trust and surrender.

I knew that I knew that I knew God had this. No detail had escaped His notice. None of these events had taken Him by surprise. God was in control and I had nothing to worry about. Nothing. I couldn't even make myself feel anxious. I think at one point I tried telling myself, "you should be feeling some anxiety over this. This has the potential to mess everything up. You might have to do a DITY move, or stay behind while Isaak goes to DC without you, drive there solo with the girls....."

But nope. Nada. The anxiety and worry just wouldn't come. All I could do was smile.

Smile, because in the deepest parts of me, God had replaced trust where worry used to be. And peace where anxiety used to reside.

I've never felt so free. Like, actually free. Weightless. Light as a feather. What it feels like to be carried. To have no burdens.

"Cast your cares on the LORD and he will sustain you; he will never let the righteous be shaken." Psalm 55:22

And, that did take me by surprise. Because in my past, I have not been that girl. I am the girl who when thrown a curveball in life, my initial response is to worry. Granted, I eventually come around and turn to the Lord, trusting Him with whatever outcome there may be. But initially, initially, the very first thought when stress strikes.....is usually not trust. Trust usually comes after I've assessed the situation, worried about it, and then decided God was better off handling it.

But this time was different.

This time, finally, my very first instinct was trust, instead of worry. It was peace, instead of anxiety.

I've never felt that so immediately. 

I knew that God was in control and working in the background on our behalf. God just so clearly had a plan. So clearly. Nothing has gone the way it "should". Nothing has happened on time, gone according to our plan, there have been roadblocks and detours...but God has been in the midst of it all. Every part. Working it our for our good.

And being able to stop and feel and see that....just makes me want to celebrate. And smile. And laugh. Even if it makes me look like I'm off my rocker. Because God is so good.

I never want to forget this day. God's work in my life. My trust in Him. My response that day. Knowing that He is faithful to provide and take care of us, even when we haven't see the final fruits of His labor yet. And remembering that I have a choice. I can take His hand and walk in freedom and stake my claim to the peace that He offers. Or I can give in to worry and stress.

But after tasting what it feels like to be that free, that weightless....I never want to go back. But I'm human, and weak and there will be times when I probably will.....but this day will be forever etched in my heart to remind me why I shouldn't.

"It is for freedom that Christ has set us free. Stand firm, then, and do not let yourselves be burdened again by a yoke of slavery. " Galations 5:1

Fast forward.....one day later....we received in the mail the latest results from my thyroid blood work I had done a few days prior. And what did they show...that eight months after receiving radiation treatment on my thyroid, after months and months of waiting and tweaking my medication, my thyroid levels are finally within normal range. Finally. After everything my body hss gone through, not just these past eight months, but years and years, my thyroid hormones are finally stable. Praise God. And then two days after that....on Friday morning, Isaak finally got his orders. That afternoon, we secured a house on Bolling AFB without having to be present to sign a lease or have someone else do it on our behalf. Praise God. And yesterday, Tuesday morning, we scheduled TMO to pick up and move our household goods for February 17th....right when we wanted them to come. And we will have a home for them to deliver them to...right where we wanted to live. And my levels are right where they're suppose to be.

It seems like a drastic understatement to say that God is good. He is so much better than good. So much better.....He is perfect. His ways are perfect. His timing is perfect. His love is perfect. He is in every detail. And as we continue to await the final piece of news concerning my medical clearance....it is vitally important that I remember this. And, no matter what else happens, I am resolved to rejoice over who He is and what He's done in our lives.

May I never forget His goodness, and His faithfulness, and His provisions and love and mercy in my life. May I never forget this day and the freedom that was mine because of Him.

^"but those who hope in the LORD will renew their strength. They will soar on wings like eagles; they will run and not grow weary, they will walk and not be faint." Isaiah 40:31