An admission over dinner.....

I can't believe I'm about to admit this. Truly. This surpasses the post I did two posts ago. However, I believe that there will come a time when I will need to remember this and if I don't write it down for safe keeping it may get lost in the jumbled up mess of my brain and ten years down the road when I may need to blackmail someone or ward off evil boyfriends....this will come in handy. Plus it is just the absolute funniest thing ever....

It all started over dinner.....

We were sitting down to dinner this evening. We were all talking about this and that. Time was passing. "How's the chicken?" "Oh, it's yummy." "Everyone liking the couscous?" "Mmm hmm. Good."

Regular dinner talk stuff.

And then out of the blue, Marvelly looks slyly at Sydaleigh and asks, "did you tell mom what I did when we were outside playing?"

Sydaleigh's eyes get all big and she giggles, "no!"

Then Marvelly starts giggling. But no one says anything more.

So I ask, "Marvelly, what did you do outside?"

She replies...." I went poop."

Oh. my. gosh. I almost choke on my couscous. My head jerks back and now my eyes are buggin' outta my head. I glance over to Isaak and his eyes are stuck in the same shocked and locked position as mine. "I'm sorry, what did you say?! Did you say you went p-p-poop?!"

Both girls are giggling.

"Yeah. I went poop. Outside. In the bushes."

I'm sorry. I know I can't be hearing this right. I think, I may have just hallucinated those words coming out of your mouth. Rewind.....

"Wait a minute wait a minute. You went poop outside? Where?" 

This can not be true. She has got to be makin' this up. Marvelly would not just up and decide to poop outside when there are three perfectly good toilets in the house.


"Yeah. In the bushes, I told you."

Oh. my. gosh, she's dead serious! I'm bewildered. I glance over at Isaak and he can't hardly look at me, he's on the verge of erupting in laughter.

"What did you wipe with?"

"A leaf."

A leaf?!? You wiped your butt with a leaf?! My daughter just admitted to pooping in her own backyard in a bush and wiping her bum with a leaf! What the freakin' crap! (no pun intended)

"Well what did you do with it?" I ask.

"I covered it up with leaves and grass." Marvelly responds very proudly, like, of course she covered it up. Duh. Like she's gonna let her stankin' poo just sit out there exposed and uncovered.

I look at Isaak. We are both on the verge of losing it. I'm still in somewhat disbelief. So I tell Isaak, "quick, go outside and see if you can find it." As if it's like, treasure or something, when in fact it's poo. Clearly we have mental problems!

So off he goes, in the middle of dinner, to look for his daughter's poo in the back yard. The girls plaster their faces to the window and watch him walk out and there is Sydaleigh saying, "There he is! Look! He found it!" followed by more laughter.

Oh. my. gosh!!

Isaak comes in a few minutes later, with his mouth pulled tight to suppress his smile, and he just nods his head...yip....there was poop out there. She was tellin' the truth.

"Marvelly, why didn't you go in the house!? Or the bathroom that's already outside?!"

"There's a bathroom outside?!"

YES!

"I didn't want to."

Oh . my. gosh!!!!

What do you even say to that?! Who's kid does that?!

Eyeyeye. Marvelly, apparently. My hilariously silly overly animated little dainty shy button sized second born. That's who. What a funny kid. What a totally weird thing to do! Seriously, the things that go through kid's heads sometimes is so weird!

The rest of our conversation over dinner involved discussing the proper places to go poop when there is a toilet available. Our back yard is not one of them. I am aware that we live in Burkina and toilets may not always be available, and in the event that there is no toilet, then it is totally fine to go to the bathroom elsewhere. But at home...well, I'd prefer for them to not poop in the yard.

I can not even believe I just wrote that!

Marvelly nodded her head in agreement and then proceeded to eat her dinner with her hands.

Oh, Burkina. What the heck are you doin' to my kids?!?!